Try Harder
by 2three.abi
Summary: He didn't know what made him kiss her again and again, he just did. He always made sure to think things through before even acting on them. But then, he lost control. And it was all because of her.


I own nothing. Cheers.

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Summary: He didn't know what made him kiss her again and again, he just did. He always made sure to think things through before even acting on them. But then, he lost control. And it was all because of her.

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_**You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back. -Barbara DeAngelis**_

* * *

It wasn't supposed to be that way. He already thought things out, and he certainly didn't expect this kind of thing to actually happen.

The spiky-haired nin sighed as he looked at the end of his still unlit cigarette. He reached for his front vest pocket, searching for the lighter the late Asuma gave him before he passed on.

_Asuma_.

He would probably know what to do if he was here. He would know the exact words to tell him, the words he definitely wanted to hear for now.

"I thought I'd find you here," he heard someone say. He frowned and clicked his tongue, as he sensed her presence nearing him now. "I know that you probably didn't want to talk about this, but..."

Shikamaru turned around to look at her. There she was, standing two feet away from him. She was wearing a simple kimono and her blonde hair was down.

He frowned. That was unusual. She never let her hair down.

"...I've already decided."

He frowned. '_What the hell is she saying?'_ he thought, as he tried to light the cigarette in his hand.

She took his silence as a sign to continue. "I've decided to... you know. Have the baby."

His eyes widened. _But that would mean...?_

"I will have this baby, even without your help. I know that you haven't even thought of having a family," she said and she snickered as she remembered his exact words on the night when...

He gently shook his head.

* * *

__**Third Person's POV**

_It was just a one night-stand. _

_Well, a night that he didn't even plan anyway. It was a just drunken night, a night when Naruto came back from a mission and decided to treat his friends to barbeque. Of course, Choji didn't insist. The moment he heard the word barbeque, he immediately went to the barbeque restaurant, dragging Shikamaru on the way._

_A few hours passed by and Naruto's toad wallet decreased in size as the money inside it also decreased, when Kiba decided to order a bottle of the restaurant's finest sake._

_They were already considered as a group of drunken nins who were mumbling non-sense when the Sakura's group came in. The women decided to have a night out because apparently, Temari was in Konoha. She came because of an official Suna business, together with her brothers, Kankuro and the Kazekage Gaara._

_The women found out about this and they decided to invite Temari out. And after a few minutes of persuasions and playful glares, Temari nodded in approval and told the Kazekage about this small get-together. Gaara just nodded and told the blonde to be careful even though he knew that his sister was capable of taking care of herself._

_And so, they went inside the restaurant and ordered for a lot of things, and heard familiar voices from the farthest table from them._

**-o-**

_"Hear, hear!" a drunk Kiba said, while aimlessly swinging his hand in the air, "Choji, I dare you to kiss Ino on the lips tomorrow morning. French."_

_Cheers erupted from the said table as Choji nodded his head. He took another glass of sake and drank it all. He then turned to his best friend Shikamaru, who has his face cradled on the back of his hand. "I dare you to drink half of the bottle, Shikamaru!"_

_"This is troublesome. You know I don't drink, Choji."_

_The young Akimichi nodded. "That's why I'm daring you to."_

_Shikamaru clicked his tongue as Neji (who was probably drunk, too) passed him the liquor. He made a face when he tasted it, burning its way down on his throat as he forced to drink the liquor down. The spiky-haired nin gently shook his head as he felt the world around him turn as cheers and cat-calls suddenly erupted from everyone seated around him._

_It was then that a blonde-haired konoichi approached them, the veins on her forehead seemed to throb because of annoyance._

_"Idiots! What are you doing here spending your time drinking that horrible drink?" Ino asked, and the guys seemed to quiet down because of her sudden outburst._

_And then, it was Kiba who broke the silence. "Oi, Choji. You don't have to wait for tomorrow. I dare you to kiss Ino now!"_

_Ino stood there, frozen and she didn't know what to do. She flushed beet red when Choji stood up and walked straight (at least, he tried to) to her. "Cho-"_

_Her words were cut when his lips came crushing down to hers clumsily._

_Cheers once again erupted from the guys, except from Neji (who was so drunk that he didn't even care) and Shikamaru (who has his head on top of the table, muttering words like troublesome, too lazy to move and head aching)._

__**-o-**

_"Where could that Ino-pig go?" Sakura asked, as she wondered where her friend was. It has been a whole fifteen minutes since she left for the comfort room._

_"M-maybe there are a lot of people in the CR," a blushing Hinata said. She has heard that Naruto just came back from another mission, but she still hasn't seen him. Oh well, she would just greet him tomorrow morning if ever she would see him somewhere._

_Sakura was about to stand up when Temari grabbed her wrist and motioned for her to sit down. "I think I know where to find her," she said, as she heard the said missing konoichi's giggles amidst the masculine howls of laughter._

_She stood up, walked to the farthest table and there she found Ino, cuddling with... Choji? Her eyes widened. Oh, this was just getting interesting. She then noticed Shikamaru, who was mumbling something under his breath with his head on top of the table. She then looked at Kiba questioningly._

_"He only drank half a glass and he's already like that."_

_The blonde sat down beside the young Nara and asked Kiba for a glass of sake. The said Konoha nin raised one of his eyebrows at her before filling the glass with liquor. Both his eyes widened when Temari drank all the contents of the glass in one swig. _

_"What?" she asked, snickering at Akamaru's owner, "you think I can't handle my drinks?"_

_Kiba immediately shook his head and turned to his side. He saw Naruto, who was already sleeping with his head on top of the table, with a drool coming out from the corner of his mouth. Scrunching his nose, Kiba decided to send his friend home. He heard protests, which came from Ino and Neji (well, that was unusual), but he insisted._

_Neji sighed and stood up. It has been a long time since he had fun like this, but the sake was getting into his head he decided. He has been a little dizzy since his last sip of the said liquor, and to make sure that he wouldn't make silly things because of his current state, going home would probably be the best option._

_So Naruto (who was still knocked out because of all the sake Kiba forced him to drink), together with Kiba and Neji (who were singing a lullaby) went out of the restaurant. Temari looked at the couple seated in front of her. Ino and Choji were whispering to each other, and every time the young Akimichi would tell the konoichi something in her ear, she would giggle endlessly, which irked Temari to the fullest._

Gaaah_. She couldn't really handle seeing these two in a lovey-dovey situation such as this. She then decided to drag the still intoxicated Shikamaru out of that place after drinking the last contents of the bottle Kiba had ordered from earlier._

_"Wha-what?" the spiky-haired nin asked her, as he blinked the sleepiness away from his reddening eyes._

_She then looked at him and frowned, annoyance was visible in her eyes. "Why did you drink if you knew you had low alcohol tolerance?"_

_He sniffed and shivered as the cool breeze blew past them. "Choji dared me," he then answered. Shikamaru turned to look at her and he just couldn't help himself. He suddenly crushed his lips onto hers._

* * *

And that was when things went out of hand. First, he was kissing the hell out of her and then, the next thing he knew, he was naked lying next to her equally naked form the moment he woke up the next morning.

He remembered talking to her after the _moments_ they had shared last night. They talked about their dreams, their future. He told him he didn't want any commitment at the moment and she told him how much she wanted someone to tell her just how much that someone cared for her… how much that someone loved her.

And then, he was kissing her again.

He didn't know what made him do that, what made him kiss her again and again, he just did. He didn't normally act on impulse. He always made sure to think things through before even acting on them. But then, he lost control. And it was all because of her.

**-o-**

Two days after, she went home together with her brothers. Not a single word was spoken about what happened that night between them.

He went on an S-class mission, and came back one and a half month later after successfully completing it, together with his new team members. Shikamaru found out that she was here again in Konoha, and that she was looking for him.

Frowning and muttering under his breath, the spiky-haired nin went to the place where he could find her, according to Sakura.

He found her, standing by the tree near the playground where he and his friends used to play when they were little. He motioned to sit on the swing and asked her why she was looking for him.

Temari was quiet for a while and it almost made him uneasy. But then, the words that came out from her mouth almost gave him a heart attack.

"I'm pregnant."

He muttered all the bad words that he knew of, and he didn't even notice that she was already gone. She was probably hurt by his reaction, but nobody could blame him, right?

**-o-**

He wandered aimlessly across the town after that… which brought him to this situation now. The sun has already set as he sat on a bench made of stone at the side of the road, holding a cigarette in his hand.

"I thought I'd find you here," he then heard her say. "I know that you probably didn't want to talk about this, but... I've already decided. I've decided to... you know. Have the baby. I will have this baby, even without your help. I know that you haven't even thought of having a family."

There were these weird buzzing sounds in his ear, and Shikamaru swore that he didn't want to hear all the words that she was saying. He just wanted to hug her, to wipe away the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes and to hold her for eternity.

But he didn't. She finished her speech and stood near where he was currently sitting. It was like… she was waiting for him to say something.

Temari closed her eyes. She wasn't supposed to feel this way. She must not feel this weak. She knew he was about to say something… she could sense it, that was why she waited. There was this little tingle on the bottom of her heart that told her to wait, and to hope that he would try to make it work for the both of them… and for the unborn child that she was carrying in her womb.

But then, he remained silent, and all the hope that she has shattered into a million pieces. She saw how much he struggled just to say a single word to her. And she also saw how he failed in doing so.

Shikamaru Nara was having an internal battle against himself. He knew he wasn't into her, or in love with her, but there was something in him that was telling him that maybe… just _maybe_, things between them could actually work out. But then, he shook his head mentally.

He wasn't ready for this. He was still too young. And so, he decided.

He told her that he wasn't ready yet, and she took it just fine... like she was expecting this answer from him.

Offering him one last smile, she turned around and walked away, together with her promise. A promise that she would not show herself to him ever again.

Looking at her back as she walked away, the spiky-haired nin closed his eyes and sighed.

* * *

Temari was chanting these words in her mind in every step she took. '_Try harder. I'm worth it._'

She took another step. '_Try harder. I'm worth it._'

And another one. '_Try harder. I'm worth it._'

And then, another one. '_Try harder. I'm worth it._'

She didn't even notice the tears falling from her eyes as she walked away.

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**A/N:** There goes my first try in writing a Naruto fic. I swear I was giggling the whole time I was typing this. Lol. XD


End file.
